We Contain Multitudes
Joon Ae Haworth-Kaufka on how BIPOC adoptees are rewriting the mainstream adoption narrative
That's Group Living
An excerpt from "Group Living and Other Recipes" by Lola Milholland
Please Don't Be Dead
Ryan Pfeil writes about reckoning with mortality and butterfly pupae.
The Tale of the Teacher's Daughter
Celina Patterson on her father, fairy tales, and turning straw into gold.
Conexión con Nuestro Territorio
A hike and conversation in Spanish, presented in partnership with Vámonos Outside and Bend Parks and Recreation District.
En este espacio haremos una actividad de senderismo mientras te invitamos a que converses con otros participantes sobre tu relación con el territorio, y descubras nuevas formas de explorarlo. Conectémonos a través de nuestra cultura y experiencias compartidas. Tendremos alimentación y transporte incluído para quienes lo soliciten. Vámonos Outside estará a cargo de actividades para niños.
A Father's Dance
An essay by Jordan Marzka
Our Encampments
An excerpt from Jessica E. Johnson's memoir, "Mettlework: A Mining Daughter on Making Home"
People, Places, Things: BLK&GLD
Portraits of family members by Oregon photographer John Adair
Unwritten
Jessica Yen on the anxieties and frustrations of parenting in multiple languages.
Rainwater Soup
Patti Moss on the echoes of family, memory, and home.
Ponderosas and Junipers
George James Kenagy writes about the trees that defined his childhood and his family ties to Central Oregon.
Treasures
Sam Mowe on Buddhism, heritage, and his family home
Corazón de Fuego / Heart of Fire
La Comida de Nuestras Madres / The Foodways of our Mothers by Yanely Rivas
Our Untapped Treasures: Children and Elders are Problem Solvers too
There are many reasons why people fail to invite children and elders to the table when it comes to solving problems: “They’re too young.” “They need to be protected from hearing about serious issues.” “I’m sure they care, but the world is a very different place now.” “They’re just going to talk about how things used to be.” “I wouldn’t want my child to be burdened with this reality.” “I don’t want to have to explain the issues repeatedly.”
The more serious the issue, the less likely it is that a child or elder will be helping to come up with a solution. We were all children once, and sometimes we had great solutions to problems that adults didn’t have. If we’re fortunate, we’ll all become elderly, and we will have a wealth of experience and accumulated wisdom to share. The goal of this conversation is to encourage people to approach problem solving in a more inclusive manner and ask elders or children to share their ideas.
Tonalidades de la Vida / Shades of Life
Ana Maria Rodriguez on family, field work, and the many meanings of "green."
Portrait of My Mother in Mint Green
She lived most of her life in the United States. Why didn’t she become a citizen?
Memoria Ancestral
Comic by Yanely Rivas
Entrevista: Rafael Romero Vejar habla de la vida del campo y sus sueños por su familia
Rafael Romero habla con su padre, Rafael Romero Vejar, Subre su vida de trabajo en el campo, su experiencia de migración, y lo que quiere para su familia.
Interview: Rafael Romero Vejar on Field Work and Family
Rafael Romero speaks with his father, Rafael Romero Vejar, about his experiences working in agriculture and the dreams he has for his family.
Room 5
Adam Sawyer writes about finding hope and healing in a hundred-year-old hotel on the Oregon Coast
How to Build a Snow Cave
Joliene Adams reflects on loneliness, chronic pain, and her father's life.
Safety Search
Judy Jiang writes about looking for solace in words after the death of a family member.
Some People Eat Fish
An excerpt from 'Diary of a Misfit' by Casey Parks
Refugio
La experiencia de una familia con migración, detención, y encontrando seguridad en Oregon. Por Ana Maria Rodriguez con Nella May Parks
Refuge
One family's experience with migration, border detention, and finding safety in Oregon. By Ana Maria Rodriguez with Nella Mae Parks
A Haven, A Refuge
Jaton Rash on the fine line between being sheltered and unsheltered.
The Distance Between Us
Barb Lachenbruch writes about reconnecting with her son through their shared vocation.
Loneliness and Aging: Making Space for Our Elders
Loneliness and isolation are common experiences for elderly people, especially for those who do not have nearby family members or who are not computer literate. What do you know about the elders in your life or in your neighborhood? Are they connected to their families in an enriching way? Do they belong to a caring community of some kind? This conversation is for elderly people and people who live near elders or have elderly people in their lives to explore questions, experiences, and obstacles to showing up for elderly people and to generate ideas for connection.
Creation Stories
Melissa Bennett writes about the bittersweet search for her Indigenous roots as a transracial adoptee.
The Wisdom That Finds Us
Stacey Rice recalls her journey of struggle and survival as a transgender elder.
We Will Be Here
Lana Jack writes about the mourning, resilience, and resistance of the Celilo Wy-am.
Unapologetically Afghan American
Yalda Asmatey writes about straddling two worlds: Afghanistan, the country of her birth, and the United States.
In Praise of No Other Options
Jessica E. Johnson writes about the benefit of having a captive audience.
Pack Matters
Erica Berry on wolves, family, fear, and love
Boarding School Inheritance
Nolan James Briden writes intergenerational trauma and incarceration in this excerpt from Prisons Have a Long Memory: Life Inside Oregon’s Oldest Prison, a collection of writing by prisoners at Oregon State Penitentiary.
From the Director: Grounding
Adam Davis on not knowing where we will be buried
Gray Matters
Ryan Pfeil on how the challenges of 2020 affected his work, family, and memory
Día de los Muertos
This comic by Yanely Rivas reflects on the meaning of Día de los Muertos and honoring and communing with ancestors.
The Middle of Nowhere
Evelyn Sharenov writes about memory, music, and maternal inheritance.
Lines for the Dead
Melissa Madenski on honoring those we loved and lost as the whole people they were.
The River Oblivion
Laura Gibson on family, forgetting, and the underworld.
Mëshatàm Lënapehòkink: I remember the land of the Lenape
A photoessay by Joe Whittle about finding joy and mourning on four journeys home.
Telling Our Story
May Saechao writes about how the Iu Mien community connects to history and traditions across time and distance.
The Act of Remembering
Jamie Passaro reflects on the purpose of the obituary.
A Bridge Between
Kate Lucky on how we connect to family history as it turns from memory into myth.
Proper Care
Diane Choplin on the messy business of birthing lambs and the more complicated work of raising children.
The Father I Remember
Hoang Samuelson writes about her family's story and the quiet care of her father.
Making Pre-K Possible
This comic by Sarah Mirk explores how universal preschool went from an idea to the ballot to law in 2020.
The Caregiver Strain Index
Erica Goss reflects on the experience of caring for her son within a dysfunctional mental health system.
Consider This with Laura Kipnis
Join us for a conversation with Laura Kipnis, author of Love in the Time of Contagion and Unwanted Advances, on love, marriage, and capitalism. Kipnis is a cultural critic and essayist whose work focuses on sexual politics in the United States. This program is part of our 2022 Consider This series American Dreams, American Myths, American Hopes.
Beyond Pigmentocracy
Chance White Eyes and Rachel L. Cushman write about how racism, representation, and internalized oppression affect their family
The Rebirth of Wonder
Tricia Gates Brown on poetry, mortality, and the love you don't see coming
They Belong to Themself
We do not possess the intellect, identity, or sexuality of our children, Chelsea King writes in this essay. We are only witnesses to their journeys.
Connect in Place - Do You Remember? Why We Celebrate Anniversaries and Holidays
Memorials, holidays, and anniversaries are opportunities to tell stories about how we relate to what came before, and how that informs what we see as the work ahead. This time of year is full of anniversaries and holidays, including Stonewall, Juneteenth, Fourth of July, and the racial justice uprisings of last summer. What does it mean to commemorate, and why do we do it?
Five Cemeteries
Bija Gutoff writes about seeking serenity among old headstones after the sudden death of her father.
Where We Store Shame
Larina Warnock writes about her family's attempts to fill the void of poverty and how it shaped her understanding of what to hold onto.
The Things We Carry
Vanessa Houk and her family escaped the wildfires, but lost their home and all of their possessions. Here, she describes what remains.
Posts
Readers write about Possession.
Connect In Place: Should Schools Reopen? Risk, Reward, and Making Decisions in Community
Schools in Oregon are in the process of bringing students back into physical classrooms after a full year of virtual learning for many. Join Aimee Craig in a reflective conversation that asks, How do you weigh risks and benefits? How do we make decisions as a community when risk is involved?
Saved by the Bell
Food writer Heather Arndt Anderson on how childhood poverty and working in the school cafeteria shaped her connection with her subject.
Love and Noodles
Marilou Carrera writes about the meaning of pancit, a dish that is so much more than just fried noodles—it's history, family, and community.
“We Know Who’s Got Our Six Now”
Bruce Poinsette considers the Father's Group, an intergenerational community group in Central Oregon, as an example for the future of Black-led organizing in Oregon.
Fermenting My Asian American Identity
Jen Shin writes about how a summer in Vietnam helped her embrace her Korean heritage.
Connect in Place: Bias and Kids
Most people agree that children need healthy, loving, supportive environments to thrive. But biases can affect how we interact with the children in our lives in ways we may not even realize. By reflecting on our biases, we can be more aware of how we impact children’s perceptions of themselves and others. During our conversation, we will reflect on how our biases—conscious and unconscious—related to gender, race, class, culture, and other traits shape everything from our subtle interactions with the kids we care for to the way we make political decisions that influence children in our society.
Posts
Readers write about Feed
From the Director: What It Means to Be Seen
Adam Davis on writing obituaries for family in the midst of a pandemic.
Kitchen Ghost
Digging into the origins of her family's Filipino–Polish food traditions, Lola Milholand finds a tangle of colonialism, identity, and hurt.
Mama Will Feed You
A mother’s journey through cultural reclamation, changing food systems, and the new wave of mutual aid
Eid al-Adha, Festival of Sacrifice
Visiting family in Egypt during Eid Al-Adha, when sheep and cattle are sacrificed and their meat is given away, an Egyptian-American writer considers family, faith, and violence.
Into the Woods
Dionisia Morales writes about what happened when she dragged her her father, a life-long New Yorker, to see the California Redwoods for the first time.
Without a Towel
Dani Nichols writes about the lessons learned during a lifelong battle with water.
Heavy
Pandemic and politics surfaced feelings I couldn't face, or even describe. So I ate them. An essay by Bobbie Willis Soeby
The Family You Choose
Residents of Portland’s C3PO camps share their experiences of street life, the pandemic, and building a new community. By Olivia Wolf
The Bakken Breaks
Jennifer Strange writes about how she and her husband, both avowed environmentalists, found themselves working North Dakota's Bakken oil fields.
Steelhead
An excerpt from Tina Ontiveros's memoir, rough house.
The Other Side of What We Know
Caitlyn May writes about searching for the identity lost when her mother was adopted by a white family in New York.
Race and Adoption
In this conversation, facilitator Astrid Castro will ask participants to explore questions such as, What role do race and racism play in your family? What are the personal experiences that inform how you talk to adopted children in your life about where they are from? Where do you need to grow to be the best resource you can be for children who are adopted?
Virtual Think & Drink with Kali Thorne Ladd, Alex Sager, and Paul Susi: What Are Schools for?
A live conversation on the purpose of school for students, parents, teachers, and the community at large. Watch the recording of this August 2020 program here.
My Left Thumb
Melissent Zumwalt writes about what she has inherited from her absentee father.
Full Membership
My thoughts, ambitions, and dreams did not have a gender. Why did my pay?
My Parents’ Exes
Cartoonist Kane Lynch interviews his parents’ former partners about how their lives intersected.
The Privilege to Raise Our Voices
Melissa Hart writes about her mother, her daughter, and finding meaning in protest across generations.
Posts
Readers write about “Union.”
People, Places, Things
Berenice Chavez photographs her mother.
The View from Council Crest
Ruby McConnell writes about revisiting the landscape of her sister's fatal overdose.
Indian Enough
Emma Hodges writes about how the "enduring colonialist notion" of blood quantum fails to encompass the complexity of Native identity.
Consider the Wedding—2004
Jamie Passaro considers why women who know better still buy into the Big Bucks White Wedding industry in the 2004 “Marriage” issue.
Resume of Failures—2011
Kim Stafford writes about the stories of struggle, insecurity, and loss behind his accomplishments in the 2011 “Fail” issue.
Making Men—2016
Bobbie Willis Soeby writes about raising her sons to not rape in the 2016 “Edge” issue.
Good Hair—2017
Kimberly Melton writes about the meaning of hair and going natural despite family and society expectations in the 2017 “Carry” issue.
If You've Made It This Far
An excerpt from Don Waters' memoir These Boys and Their Fathers
Saturdays Inside
Madeline Baars Brandt writes about her experience of driving girls to visit their incarcerated mothers.
A Body in Motion
Tara L. Campbell on searching for the roots of her daughter's incessant rocking and her own need to stay moving.
Editor's Note: Pushing Forward, Holding Back
Kathleen Holt writes about seeing herself reflected in her son's fierce passions.
The Life We Pay For
Tina Ontiveros writes about the different paths her life and her sister's have taken since their shared childhood experiences of poverty and abandonment.
Posts
Readers write about Push.
What I Do
Between writing, housekeeping, and mothering, my life is full. But I still feel pressure to make my mark, to show I was here. An essay by Jamie Passaro.
Talking about Place, Race, and Family
An interview with Ezra Marcos Ayala, a photographer and father of three living in Ashland.
More than Words
Emilly Prado explores the stories of three families in the small rural border town of Nyssa, Oregon, and how immigration policy changes have affected their lives.
Editor's Note: Finite and Unpredictable
Editor Kathleen Holt writes about the settling and unsettling of an aging parent.
New Foundations
Samantha Bakall writes about an innovative pilot project that pairs families in need of housing with Portland homeowners who have a little land to spare.
Black Nightshade and Bierocks
Heather Arndt Anderson writes about finding connections to her Volga German ancestors through recipes and semi-poisonous berries.
Relearning Home
Mark Putney writes about finding belonging in a Willamette Valley hazelnut orchard after leaving the wilds of Kodiak, Alaska.
Waiting
Renee Soasey writes about reckoning with her father's life and approaching death.
Bias and Kids: How Do Our Prejudices Affect Our Children?
During our conversation led by Verónika Nuñez and Kyrié Kellett, we will reflect on how our biases—conscious and unconscious—related to gender, race, class, culture, and other traits, shape everything from our subtle interactions with the kids we care for to the way we make political decisions that influence children in our society.
Conversation Project: Bias and Kids
How Do Our Prejudices Affect Our Children?
Conversation Project: Bias and Kids
How Do Our Prejudices Affect Our Children?
Conversation Project: Bias and Kids
How Do Our Prejudices Affect Our Children? This event will be held in Spanish
Conversation Project: Race and Adoption
In this conversation, facilitator Astrid Castro will ask participants to explore questions such as, What role do race and racism play in your family? What are the personal experiences that inform how you talk to adopted children in your life about where they are from? Where do you need to grow to be the best resource you can be for children who are adopted?
Conversation Project: Bias and Kids
How Do Our Prejudices Affect Our Children?
Editor's Note: The Point of the World
Editor Kathleen Holt on children, caution, and turning toward the struggle for justice.
Episodes in People Watching
Dionisia Morales on teaching kids to be wary of their surroundings in an excerpt from her book, "Homing Instincts"
People, Not Pundits
Catherine Johnson writes about attending a conservative convention in an effort to understand her mother's politics.
True Costs
Editor Kathleen Holt on the immeasurable obligations between parents and children
Buying Time
Wendy N. Wagner on what we owe our children
Posts
Readers write about Owe
Conversation Project: Stone Soup
How Recipes Can Preserve History and Nourish Community
Conversation Project: Stone Soup
How Recipes can Preserve History and Nourish Community
Conversation Project: What We Owe
Living With Debt
Unclaiming the Land
Melissa Madenski writes about leaving her home of forty years and what binds us to the places in our lives.
Sixteen in America
Marissa Levy writes about mental illness exacerbated by stresses created by social media and academic pressure.
Conversation Project: Stone Soup
How Recipes Can Preserve History and Nourish Community
Editor's Note: Chipping Away
Kathleen Holt on eroding the system of patriarchal oppression as a parent.
The Reflex
Jamie Passaro on searching for the cause of her daughter's debilitating tantrums
Posts
Readers write about Harm
Conversation Project: Stone Soup
How Recipes Can Preserve History and Nourish Community
What's Brewing?
The Crook County Foundation hosts this public forum on current events and issues happening locally, regionally, and at the state level. This is an Oregon Humanities grant-funded event.
Conversation Project: Stone Soup
How Recipes Can Preserve History and Nourish Community
Conversation Project: Stone Soup
How Recipes Can Preserve History and Nourish Community
My Brother's Keeper: "Unlisted: A Story of Schizophrenia"
This fall, Four Rivers Cultural Center in Ontario will present "My Brother's Keeper," a series of eight documentary film screenings exploring the lives of marginalized peoples and issues such as mental health, addiction, and mass incarceration. Each screening will be followed by a presentation and Q&A session by a local nonprofit or government agency.
Conversation Project: What Are You?
Mixed-Race and Interracial Families in Oregon’s Past and Future
People Aren’t Illegal
Photographer Ezra Marcos Ayala reflects on the making of “To Live More Free”
Invite in the Stranger
Adam Davis on radical hospitality
S'so's Tamales
Sal Sahme writes about finding his spiritual path as a boy on First Mesa.
Posts
Readers write about Claim
Conversation Project: What Are You?
Mixed-Race and Interracial Families in Oregon's Past and Future
Conversation Project: Stone Soup
How Recipes Can Preserve History and Nourish Community
Conversation Project: Understanding Disability
Family and Community Stories
Conversation Project: Stone Soup
How Recipes Can Preserve History and Nourish Community
When to Carry
Editor's note
What They Carried
The things four refugees brought with them when they came to Oregon. Story by Caitlin Dwyer, photos by Kim Oanh Nguyen
Split
Lessons about men’s and women’s work divide a boy from his community. An essay by Ryan Stroud
Conversation Project: Stone Soup
How Recipes Can Preserve History and Nourish Community
Conversation Project: Stone Soup
How Recipes Can Preserve History and Nourish Community
Good Hair
Going natural despite family and societal expectations. An essay by Kimberly Melton
Conversation Project: Understanding Disability
Family and Community Stories
Conversation Project: What Are You?
Mixed-Race and Interracial Families in Oregon's Past and Future
Conversation Project: Stone Soup
How Recipes Can Preserve History and Nourish Community
"Mothering Inside" Screening and Panel Discussion
Free screening of the documentary Mothering Inside about the effects of incarceration on families
Sometimes Break Apart
Oregon Humanities magazine editor Kathleen Holt on sexism, power, and exclusion on her son's co-ed soccer team
Uncovered
Writer Donnell Alexander and photographer Kim Nguyen on one undocumented family's long wait for adequate health care
Slow Ascent
A Chinese American woman searches for belonging in the country of her grandparents. An essay by Jessica Yen
Making Men
Writer Bobbie Willis Soeby on raising her sons to not rape
"I'm Not Staying Here Another Day"
A conversation about the Great Migration with Isabel Wilkerson and Rukaiyah Adams
The Gift of a Known World
Oregon Humanities magazine editor Kathleen Holt on the power--and privilege--of rooting oneself to places
A Tremendous Force of Will
A conversation about the Great Migration's and the civil right movement with Pulitzer Prize-winning writer Isabel Wilkerson
Housekeeping
In the face of loss, cleaning hotel rooms and a lifelong friend offer solace. An essay by Meryl Williams
Not Built for Ghosts
Writer Helen Hill on consequences she faced after leaving her beloved home in the hands of others
Between Ribbon and Root
Hope and a history of tragedy live together in a Cowlitz woman's son. An essay by Christine Dupres
Posts
Readers write about Root
Mothers to Daughters
Mothers give advice to their daughters about living bravely in an unsafe world in this film produced by Sika Stanton for Oregon Humanities.
Objects in Motion
Editor Kathleen Holt on inertia
What We Pass On
Adam Davis, executive director of Oregon Humanities, writes about cultural inheritance.
Getting Out
Loretta Stinson on deciding to leave an abusive marriage for good
All the Same Ocean
Finding the horizon in a life rocked with waves. An essay by Jason Arias
Posts
Readers write about Move
David and Goliath
Remembering a friend from a hospice house. An excerpt from What the Dying Have Taught Me about Living: The Awful Amazing Grace of God by Fred Grewe, an Oregon Humanities Talking about Dying community discussion leader.
Safely and Bravely
Editor Kathleen Holt on keeping her daughter safe in a place filled with threats of violence, disappointment, and despair
Plague Fears
Eula Biss writes about how a threat becomes a plague in this excerpt from her book On Immunity.
Group Therapy
Copping out at an uptown slumber party. An essay by Dionisia Morales
This Is Not Just a Cloud
Embracing grief in the wilderness. An essay by Michael Heald
The Rim of the Wound
Writer Wendy Willis's open letter to the students of Columbia University Multicultural Affairs Advisory Board, with a special note to her daughters.
Posts
Readers write about Safe
Magazine Podcast: Fix
Jaimie Passaro talks about parenting through bipolar episodes with Oregon Humanities editor Kathleen Holt
A Return Passage
Reporter Putsata Reang and photographer Kim Nguyen share their stories of leaving their home countries as refugees, meeting as students at the University of Oregon, and returning to Southeast Asia as journalists. A film produced by Dawn Jones for Oregon Humanities.
Stepping Backward
Hearing lessons from a bomb. An essay by David Naimon
Beyond Repair
Editor Kathleen Holt on the aftermath of a traumatizing fire
Perhaps, Perhaps
Bobby Arellano on waiting for an alcoholic father to stand up
Resume Usual Activity
Jamie Passaro writes about parenting—and being parented—through mental illness.
Starting Over
The bumpy repair of a family after a sudden loss. An essay by Melissa Madenski
A Temporary Insanity
Torn between the pull of family and the pull of home. An essay by Gail Wells
Messy Business
Editor Kathleen Holt on parenting as performance
Boxed In
Writer Wendy Willis ponders which race to check and which people to leave behind when asked about her racial and ethnic background.
Are You My Mother?
When a new medication makes the Lois Ruskai Melina's mother more outgoing and impulsive, she must face a choice: Should she have her taken off the drug, even though she likes her better on it?
Posts
Readers Write about Quandary
Another Life
I think often of the taste of my grandfather's grapes and of the meat from my father's knife. An essay by Hanna Neuschwander
Magazine Podcast: Start
Talking about epigenetics, adoption, faith, and clowns with Oregon Humanities magazine contributors
What's the Use?
Why bother with history? Why bother at all? An essay by Robert Leo Heilman
The Bamboo Ceiling
Alex Tizon on how "Orientals" became "Asians." An excerpt from Big Little Man: In Search of My Asian Self
Almost a Family
Colleen Kaleda writes about the hope and hearbreak of international adoption.
Small Man in a Big Country
Native language is just the first thing an immigrant family abandons in order to become American. An excerpt from Little Big Man: In Search of My Asian Self by Alex Tizon
What's Mine Is Yours
Editor Kathleen Holt on developing a capacity for solitude and a habit of self-reflection in her children
You Remind Me of Me
Parent and child, strange and baffling creatures that are part, yet no part, of each other. An essay by Daniel Rivas
Posts
Readers write about "Me"
What It Means to Say Portland
Mitchell S. Jackson on the experience of growing up Black in North and Northeast Portland.
Why We Stay
Monica Drake on raising a family in an urban neighborhood instead of a more serene but less vibrant rural place.
A Crooked Still Life
An illness, a recovery, and a couple's uncertain future. An essay by Margaret Malone
Picture Their Hearts
Dionisia Morales looks back at her parents interracial marriage before the height of the Civil Rights Movement.
Being Brown
Bobbie Willis Soeby on when skin lies and when skin tells the truth
The Good Fight
Can letting our children roughhouse lead to a better democracy? An essay by Sarah Gilbert
Paradise
Tragedy on a hot summer day. An essay by Monica Drake
My Brother, the Keeper
A woman tries to understand her brother's need to hoard. An essay by Dmae Roberts
Unimaginable Riches
The unfamiliar offers its own rewards. An essay by Joanne Mulcahey
Shooting the Lions
Two cousins try to revive the family circus with tragic results. By Susan Meyers
Résumé of Failures
The stories of struggle, insecurity, and loss behind a successful writer's accomplishments. By Kim Stafford
The Long Look Back
Editor's note by Kathleen Holt
Blank Slate
In a single day, a forty-year-old man finds himself unmarried and unemployed. What to do next? An essay by Dave Weich
Go Ahead and Look
In praise of forbidden looking. An essay by Scott Nadelson
Seen Though Not Heard
In the designs on a Klikitat basket, a woman finds an unspoken link to her past. An essay by Christine Dupres
Here, Not There
A wife looks to the Greeks when her husband is called away to war. An essay by Sarah Gilbert
Irreconcilable Dissonance
The threat of divorce as the glue of marriage. An essay by Brian Doyle